COFFEETOWN HS SPORTS

‘Friday Night Lights’ hit theatres 20 years ago this fall.

Yes, Buzz Bissinger’s book is a work of art and belongs on required High School U.S. History reading lists. I’m not exaggerating about that.

The 2004 film isn’t close to 100% loyal to that book. Some people have a problem with that, but I don’t.

I saw ‘Friday Night Lights’ as a High School freshman football player. Never played the game before that season, even though I desperately wanted to. Unfortunately, I had some non-contact-related head issues that kept me off the field through the pee-wee years.

And fittingly enough, my career ended as a junior due to too many concussions and concussive migraines.

Apologies, I forgot what I was about to write here.

Oh yes. ‘Friday Night Lights’ is 20. While the film stands apart for me as an all-time favorite, and certainly an all-time sports favorite, it doesn’t hold the same status in the trophy case of everyone else who viewed it.

Believe it or not, some film critics really didn’t like it. My biggest problem with the film was that it used 2000’s-era equipment in a football environment that was set in 1988.

Those guys shouldn’t have worn the same exact Nike gloves that I wore a couple days later at practice.

Beyond that, however, ‘Friday Night Lights’ remains quotable and precious as gold with my buddies 20 years later.

So in honor of MOJO, let’s examine the reviews from people who didn’t like ‘Friday Night Lights’ and rip ’em to shreds, as I did on this week’s episode of the Go Fight Win podcast.

Friday Night Lights is a feel-good movie, but it’s not real. It’s a hard-hitting Hallmark greeting card. It’s no wonder it appealed to Larry King. It’s safe, easy, conventional, and feigns incisiveness.

– Tony Macklin, Bright Lights Film Journal

Bright Lights vs. Friday Night Lights.

Tony Macklin obviously chose to remain loyal to his publication’s illumination. That doesn’t mean he’s right.

The low-blow at Hallmark is uncalled for. There are plenty of Hallmark cards out there that make me feel things. Anything with a dog and/or googly eyes on the cover gets me right in the gut.

And Larry King’s ‘My Two Cents’ was one of the main reasons I had a Twitter account in the early 2010’s. If you have a problem with Larry King, then you have a problem with me.

Was it safe for Head Coach Gary Gaines to flip a coin for his team’s playoff hopes at that dimly-lit truck stop?

Was it easy for Boobie Miles to weep in a car with his uncle?

Do you really think it’s conventional for a dad to tape a football to his son’s hands because he fumbles too much?

I don’t know what ‘feigns incisiveness’ even means. This is a football movie, not Shakespeare, pal.

My review: Fumble

While the atmosphere is excellent, and the general elements all strong, the film sadly fails to give any real insight or depth in regards to explaining the hows and whys of the near fever over the game and its players.

– Garth Franklin, Dark Horizons

Another battle of the Friday Night Lights against an illumination-related publication.

How does a guy named Garth not enjoy a movie about Texas football? You are trying too hard, sir.

There is real insight and depth in Coach Gaines’s locker room speech for the ages. Garth must have been in the bathroom for that one.

But even if there weren’t, I don’t need depth. I don’t need insight or explanations about MOJO football. You either get it or you don’t. If this film is only for people who understand the fever of High School Football, then so be it. There are plenty of other films out there that I don’t understand. That doesn’t mean they deserve a splat on the Tomato Meter.

My review: Punt

The movie’s principles are seriously out of whack, even as (Friday Night Lights) angles toward a Big Life Lesson about learning to live with falling short of greatness.

– Jeffrey M. Anderson, Combustible Celluloid

I think one of my aunts had combustible celluloid. I’m not a doctor, and hopefully that isn’t a HIPAA violation. But I think that’s what she had.

The Big Life Lesson is don’t call a zebra crew to officiate a game in the Astrodome unless you know their credentials.

And if you blow out your knee like Boobie Miles, don’t go to a Doctor from Midland-Lee.

No life lessons are needed here. Did Boobie Miles actually become a garbage man? No. He returned to play football again. Is it out of whack to imply that maybe he should have diversified his future options a little bit? Let’s not overthink this. There ain’t much philosophy here, but unless you’ve won state, you can’t touch that ring. And that’s a fact of life.

My review: Bad snap

Its script is pure corn, drenched in syrupy sentiment and topped with prize ham in the shape of Billy Bob Thornton’s tub-thumping coach.

– Neil Smith, BBC.com

Presumably, the BBC.com fella is British. So that nullifies whatever analogy he’s trying to make there with corn, syrup and ham. But it does sound delicious.

If Blly Bob Thornton as Gary Gaines is a ‘tub-thumper,’ then that’s alright. I’ve heard Chumbawumba’s 1997 smash-hit single. If you get knocked down, you just get up again, baby.

And that’s exactly what Permian does.

My review: Horsecr*p

(Friday Night Lights) Substitutes slick, cynical point-scoring for insight.

– Charles Taylor, Salon.com

Chuck T, I admire your footwear success and your alliteration.

There was nothing cynical about Mike Winchell’s I-right wiggle 34 switchblade, for the state championship. But it was slick.

Stick to the Salon, sir.

My review: Turnover on downs